2nd Samuel Chapters 18-19 – John Karmelich

1. My theme for this lesson is “emotions and decisions”.

a) This is about how we let our emotions dictate the decisions we make in life.

b) Let’s start with the disclaimers. ☺ Emotions are a good thing.

i) God created us with a set of emotions and they affect upon our lives. For examples, in dangerous situations, we have a built-in fear instinct and if used “rationally”, we can make good decisions that would save our lives.

ii) For example, if we are walking along a cliff, there is a natural instinct to be scared and hopefully, it will cause us to walk carefully or walk away.

iii) Another example is that when we have emotional love for one another, we do things for others just out of that love.

iv) We often make good decisions based on “gut instinct”. Such instincts are usually a mixture of emotion and experience.

c) The issue-at-hand is about letting the emotions-of-the-moment cause us to make bad decisions. The human maturity process of life is often about making rational decisions as opposed to emotional decisions.

d) For example, if little children had their way, they would only deserts. I remember asking my two year old daughter what she wanted for breakfast. She replied, “ice cream”. I then said you can’t have ice cream for breakfast. She then replied, “popcorn”. ☺ It takes a parent to teach children that they need better types of food for substance.

i) It is the job of the parent to teach right-and-wrong, as opposed to what is “fun” or whatever appeals to the emotions of the kids for the moment.

ii) As a Christian adult, we constantly need to think in terms of “What is pleasing to God” as opposed to what is pleasing to ourselves.”

e) I may be stating the obvious here, but in these two chapters of 2^nd Samuel, we’re going to read of many good and bad decisions made. The bad decisions are made because the “emotions” of the person negatively affected the decision.

i) For example, Chapter 18 focuses on David’s son Absalom. This guy had a big ego. That ego led to his downfall and death. Absalom put himself first, over what God desired for his life. Absalom disobeyed God’s commandment to honor his father and mother. The emotion of “wanting everything for myself now” as opposed to living how God wants us to live caused his downfall.

f) This leads to the topic of the bible as an instruction book. Those rules and examples are there for our happiness. It is God’s instruction book for our lives. The problem is our human nature always wants to put our own desires over God’s desire for our lives.

i) The reason Christianity encourages a regular, systematic study of God’s word is to remind ourselves just what God requires of us for the sake of our own happiness. It is a guidebook on how to make good decisions as we go through life.

2. With all of that in mind, I can now summarize these two chapters of 2^nd Samuel:

a) King David’s son, Absalom, is rebelling against David.

b) Absalom is trying to kill David, who is now on the run.

c) In about half a chapter, Absalom will be dead.

d) The rest of Chapter 18 and all of Chapter 19 are the “clean up operation”.

i) It is about those who rebelled against David and how they ask for forgiveness.

e) Some of the minor characters we have read over the past few chapters will ask David for forgiveness. Their actions lead back to the topic of “emotions and decisions”.

f) Further, David’s top general (Joab) kills Absalom despite a direct order by David not to do so. Joab let his emotions affect his decision and he disobeyed a direct order.

g) David also has some guilt in this chapter. In his grief over his dead son, he fails to be a good leader and is scolded for his action. Again, this is about “emotions and decisions”.

h) Now that we’re all good and confused on this topic, it’s time to start the lesson. ☺

3. Chapter 18, Verse 1: David mustered the men who were with him and appointed over them commanders of thousands and commanders of hundreds. ² David sent the troops out--a third under the command of Joab, a third under Joab's brother Abishai son of Zeruiah, and a third under Ittai the Gittite. The king told the troops, "I myself will surely march out with you."

a) We left Chapter 17 with a civil war about to happen in Israel. On one side is exiled-King David and several thousand people who left with him. The other side is led by one of David’s sons named Absalom. The majority of Israel sided with Absalom.

b) We know from Verse 1 that the number of soldiers loyal to David is in the thousands. We also get the impression from Verse 3 that the number was less than 10,000.

c) In Chapter 17, Absalom decided to raise up a large army to go after David. Therefore, there is a time gap between Chapters 17 and 18 while Absalom raised this army.

d) These verses state David divided his army into three separate groups. One third was to be lead by “General” Joab, another third by Joab’s brother Abishai and the final third by an outsider (non-Jew) named Ittai the Gittite. We were introduced to Ittai in Chapter 15. Apparently, Ittai was some sort of exile from his homeland and became loyal to David. When the treason began, Ittai declared his loyalty to David, and now David made Ittai one of the top three generals.

e) Now let’s get to the key line: David says, “Surely I will march with you”.

i) That is David saying he wants to be hands-on involved with this war.

ii) In the next verse, the army decides it will be best if David stays back as the only goal of the “other side” is to capture and kill David.

4. Verse 3: But the men said, "You must not go out; if we are forced to flee, they won't care about us. Even if half of us die, they won't care; but you are worth ten thousand of us. It would be better now for you to give us support from the city." ⁴ The king answered, "I will do whatever seems best to you." So the king stood beside the gate while all the men marched out in units of hundreds and of thousands.

a) This whole scene takes place in a town called “Mahanaim” (Chapter 17, Verse 24). This is a gated city where David and the large entourage were based. It is about 40 miles northeast of Jerusalem, outside of the territory of the land of Israel.

b) To paraphrase what David’s troops are saying to him, “Look David, all that Absalom’s troops care about is killing you. If they do that, they win. Therefore, it is best that you stay here in Mahanaim. (Try saying that fast ten times! ☺)

c) This gets back to my theme of “emotions and decisions”. Give David credit for listening to the advice of his men. If David had a big ego, he might have said, “I don’t care, I want to be there. We’ll contrast that to the fact that his son Absalom did go into battle and die.

5. Verse 5: The king commanded Joab, Abishai and Ittai, "Be gentle with the young man Absalom for my sake." And all the troops heard the king giving orders concerning Absalom to each of the commanders.

a) Here, King David is giving specific orders to his three generals not to kill Absalom.

i) This will become important as in a few verses, General Joab disobeys that order.

b) This verse shows the dilemma that King David is going through:

i) His own son is rebelling against him and wants to kill him.

ii) Despite that, David still loves his son and wants him to be alive.

6. Verse 6: The army marched into the field to fight Israel, and the battle took place in the forest of Ephraim. ⁷ There the army of Israel was defeated by David's men, and the casualties that day were great--twenty thousand men. ⁸ The battle spread out over the whole countryside, and the forest claimed more lives that day than the sword.

a) These three verses are the only verses on the battle itself. The next few verses focus on the death of Absalom. What we learn here is that 20,000 men died in this battle.

b) Let’ that sink in for a moment: 20,000 men died here.

i) None of this would have been necessary if Absalom never rebelled. Remember Absalom he was next in line to be king.

ii) I’m pretty positive none of this would have happened if David had never slept with Bathsheba and had her husband killed.

iii) When we willfully sin, we never stop to consider the long-term consequences of that sin and how it can affect others around us.

c) Onto some battle specific’s: This battle took place in a thick, wooded forest.

i) The text says the forest killed more than the sword (Verse 8). I don’t believe it means that soldiers died from running into trees. ☺ I suspect that means that as soldiers were running, they got caught in the thick aspects of the woods, or possibly in pits, and then those soldiers were “easy prey” for the other side.

ii) This also shows the military shrewdness of David’s men. David’s generals knew they were outnumbered. In such cases, you want to fight in a location that would help “even the odds” by being adverse to both. By David’s men fighting in a forest, as opposed to an open field, David’s men had more of an “equal chance” as the adversity of the forest caused problems for both sides.

iii) Don’t underestimate how God was behind all of this. God wanted David back on the throne again and God was behind this victory. Verse 7 specifically states that David’s men won this battle decisively.

7. Verse 9: Now Absalom happened to meet David's men. He was riding his mule, and as the mule went under the thick branches of a large oak, Absalom's head got caught in the tree. He was left hanging in midair, while the mule he was riding kept on going.

a) This would make a good scene for a movie. Visualize Absalom, leading this army, riding on a mule. The mule, in a full gallop, goes under a low tree. Absalom’s head is stuck in the branches and he is left hanging in mid-air.

b) Many commentators go back to the physical description of Absalom in Chapter 14, Verse, 26. It stated that Absalom had thick hair, and he had it weighed when it was cut. Now, here is Absalom stuck in this tree. His hair could have been tangled as well, but that is a presumption. The “pun” here is that Absalom’s “big head” was his downfall.

c) In a sense, the death of Absalom was due to his ego. Remember David had enough sense to not be personally engaged in the battle, as he knew the enemy wanted him only. Contrast that with Absalom who wanted to lead the charge into battle.

d) This gets back to “emotions and decisions”. Absalom should have known he was the prime target of David’s army. With his big ego, he wanted to be there, leading the army.

8. Verse 10: When one of the men saw this, he told Joab, "I just saw Absalom hanging in an oak tree." ¹¹ Joab said to the man who had told him this, "What! You saw him? Why didn't you strike him to the ground right there? Then I would have had to give you ten shekels of silver and a warrior's belt."

a) One of David’s soldiers reported to General Joab that he spotted Absalom in the tree. General Joab replied in a sense, “Hey soldier, why didn’t you kill him when you had the chance? Don’t you know that if you killed Absalom, this war would be over! I would have given you a great reward if you had killed him!”

b) The specific reward was 10 shekels of silver and a “warrior’s belt”. The belt was a prize. It is similar to modern soldiers have medals on their chest.

9. Verse 12: But the man replied, "Even if a thousand shekels were weighed out into my hands, I would not lift my hand against the king's son. In our hearing the king commanded you and Abishai and Ittai, `Protect the young man Absalom for my sake. ' ¹³ And if I had put my life in jeopardy--and nothing is hidden from the king--you would have kept your distance from me."

a) Let me paraphrase what the soldier is saying, “Look, King David gave specific orders not to kill Absalom. Even if you paid me 10,000 shekels, I would not disobey a direct order from the king. King David would kill me if I killed Absalom.”

b) Again, we’re back to “emotions and decisions”. This soldier didn’t let the emotion of the war affect his decisions. This solider wanted to defeat the enemy, which was Absalom. Yet this soldier knew not to disobey a direct order, even if “seemed wrong.”

10. Verse 14: Joab said, "I'm not going to wait like this for you." So he took three javelins in his hand and plunged them into Absalom's heart while Absalom was still alive in the oak tree. ¹⁵ And ten of Joab's armor-bearers surrounded Absalom, struck him and killed him.

a) Joab replied in effect, “Whatever! I’m tired of this war and I’m going to end it here and now. I don’t care about David’s orders as I know killing Absalom would end this war.”

b) Therefore, Joab threw three javelins at Absalom. Just to make sure Absalom died, ten of Joab’s assistants then “finished the job” and killed off Absalom.

i) The Hebrew word for “heart” implies “central guts”. Joab could have thrown the three spears say, just in the gut and Absalom could have still been alive. That is why Verse 15 mentions the ten other guys who made sure Absalom was dead.

c) One of the things you learn from reading the bible is that “God likes to use irony”. What I mean by that is God often lets situations happen in ways that are reminders of previous situations. The way “things happen” in the bible are designed to teach us lessons.

i) And your point is? ☺ Absalom rebelled against King David. Absalom died because General Joab rebelled against David’s direct orders not to kill Absalom. The irony is in the way Absalom died.

d) Onto the big debate question: Was Joab right for what he did? Did he do the right thing by killing Absalom? Killing Absalom did end the war, but he also disobeyed a direct command by King David.

i) The answer is Joab did the wrong thing. Joab forgot that David was in charge and not Joab. Yes, killing Absalom ended the war, but that was “David’s problem”.

ii) Again, this gets back to “emotions and decisions”. Joab let his emotions of the moment affect his decisions and disobeyed a direct order.

iii) Soldiers are taught obedience over all other issues. The same should be said for Christians. God desires obedience to His commands, even when we think it is better to do something else. Again, this is about “emotions and decisions”.

iv) Yes, there are situations of “higher law”. Those are cases when someone gives us an order that is a direct violation of say, one of the 10 commandments. For example, if your boss tells you to cheat at work, you should disobey that command even if it means being fired over it.

v) Back to Joab, this is not a case of “higher law”. What Joab did was “logical” and the right thing to do to end the war, but not at the price of disobedience.

11. Verse 16: Then Joab sounded the trumpet, and the troops stopped pursuing Israel, for Joab halted them. ¹⁷ They took Absalom, threw him into a big pit in the forest and piled up a large heap of rocks over him. Meanwhile, all the Israelites fled to their homes. ¹⁸ During his lifetime Absalom had taken a pillar and erected it in the King's Valley as a monument to himself, for he thought, "I have no son to carry on the memory of my name." He named the pillar after himself, and it is called Absalom's Monument to this day.

a) David’s troops were winning and the soldiers loyal to Absalom were on the run. Joab gave the order to stop fighting. While the Israelite soldiers were fleeing, Joab’s men threw Absalom’s body into a big pit.

b) Here’s the point of all of this: Verse 18 mentions that Absalom built a big monument for himself. It is another sign of his ego. It was common in that era for pagan kings to build monuments for themselves while they were still alive (e.g., the pyramids). Remember that Absalom’s mother was a foreign queen. (Reference 2^nd Samuel 3:3).

c) That monument will now never be used. Absalom was buried in a pit. This leads back to my short discussion of “bible ironies”. Absalom, who wanted to be remembered through all of history, in a sense “gets his wish”. Unfortunately, he is immortalized as the rebellious son who died by getting stuck in a tree. ☺

d) Verse 18 states that Absalom “had no sons to carry on his name”. Back in Chapter 14, we read that Absalom had three sons (14:27). It is probable they have all died by now.

e) If you travel to Israel today, they have a monument called “Absalom’s monument”. That monument does not date back to this time era, despite what the tourist guides tell you.

f) Let’s stand back and contemplate David’s sin with Bathsheba for a moment. Here is the long term consequences of that sin:

i) Bathsheba got pregnant from that sin. The baby died. (Chapters 11-12).

ii) David’s daughter Tamar was raped by one of David’s sons (half brother/sister).

a) That son, Amnon, then was killed by another son, Absalom. (Chapter 13).

iii) Absalom, years later, then rebelled against his father David and tried to kill him. Absalom was guilty of treason, rape, and murder. He was killed.

iv) In a sense, all of this happened because David lusted over Bathsheba.

a) Part of it was God’s sentence for David’s rebellion.

b) Part of it is a “natural output” in the sense the children rebelled as David had rebelled. The kids acted like the parents.

12. Verse 19: Now Ahimaaz son of Zadok said, "Let me run and take the news to the king that the LORD has delivered him from the hand of his enemies." ²⁰ "You are not the one to take the news today," Joab told him. "You may take the news another time, but you must not do so today, because the king's son is dead." ²¹ Then Joab said to a Cushite, "Go, tell the king what you have seen." The Cushite bowed down before Joab and ran off.

a) We now move on a new story. This is the story of two “runners” who are picked to relay the message to David about Absalom’s death. Remember that David is residing in a nearby city away from where this battle is taking place. Somebody has to tell the news to David that they won the war, but his son was dead.

b) “Runner #1” is named Ahimaaz. “Runner #2” is an unnamed Cushite (i.e., a foreigner).

c) “Runner #1 (Ahimaaz) is anxious to be the runner. Joab picks “runner #2”, this unnamed Cushite instead. Joab picked “#2” because there was no positive news to tell David (see Verse 22). I suspect Joab was worried David might kill the messenger as it was a violation of David’s direct order. Therefore, Joab picks a foreigner, which was “runner #2”.

13. Verse 22: Ahimaaz son of Zadok again said to Joab, "Come what may, please let me run behind the Cushite." But Joab replied, "My son, why do you want to go? You don't have any news that will bring you a reward." ²³ He said, "Come what may, I want to run." So Joab said, "Run!" Then Ahimaaz ran by way of the plain and outran the Cushite.

a) Verses 22 and 23 tell this strange little story how “Runner #1” wants to run away. Joab tells Runner #1 in effect, “Look, I just sent Runner #2, why do you want to run? Joab agrees to let the guy go anyway, even though Runner #1 had no news to deliver to David. (Hey, maybe #1 was just in the mood for a good workout and needed an excuse. ☺)

b) The story then mentions that “Runner #1”, the one that Joab didn’t want to go, was outrunning “Runner #2”.

14. Verse 24: While David was sitting between the inner and outer gates, the watchman went up to the roof of the gateway by the wall. As he looked out, he saw a man running alone. ²⁵ The watch-man called out to the king and reported it. The king said, "If he is alone, he must have good news." And the man came closer and closer. ²⁶ Then the watchman saw another man running, and he called down to the gatekeeper, "Look, another man running alone!" The king said, "He must be bringing good news, too." ²⁷ The watchman said, "It seems to me that the first one runs like Ahimaaz son of Zadok." "He's a good man," the king said. "He comes with good news."

a) Now we get the same story of the two runners from the perspective of King David:

b) There is a watchman at the gate where David is staying. The watchman reports the two runners are approaching. The watchman recognizes the running style of “runner #1” (Ahimaaz) and gives David his name.

c) At this point, the runners have not actually reached David yet.

d) David responds to the watchman, with “Hopefully, the guy’s got good news”.

e) Let’s move on to a few more verses and then tie it all together.

15. Verse 28: Then Ahimaaz called out to the king, "All is well!" He bowed down before the king with his face to the ground and said, "Praise be to the LORD your God! He has delivered up the men who lifted their hands against my lord the king." ²⁹ The king asked, "Is the young man Absalom safe?" Ahimaaz answered, "I saw great confusion just as Joab was about to send the king's servant and me, your servant, but I don't know what it was."

a) Here is Runner #1”, the one Joab did not want to send, reaching David. From the earlier verses, we know that Runner #1 did know that Absalom was dead. Runner #1 was proud to tell David that their side had won the war. However, when David asked about the health of Absalom, Runner #1 was too scared to tell David the truth.

b) Runner #1 responded to David’s inquiry by saying in effect, “Uh, there was a great confusion and I don’t know what happened”. This was a lie.

c) The next set of verses is about “Runner #2” giving David the actual news. Before I get there, let’s stop and contemplate all these “runner” verses for a moment:

i) There are more verses dedicated to the story of the two runners going to David then there are about the civil war and the death of Absalom.

ii) My question is, “Why is so much text spent on these two runners?” The bible could have just said, “And David got the news Absalom was dead.” Instead, we have half a chapter dedicated to the story of the two runners.

iii) Again, we’re back to the theme of “emotions and decisions”: Runner #1 was full of energy and was a fast runner. When it came time to actually deliver the message, he didn’t have the courage to do it. To deliver a message: (i.e., a lesson to preachers and teachers) is that not only do we need to have the energy and skill, but also the “boldness” to actual do what God has called us to do!

iv) The balance of course, is to not procrastinate forever. One is never fully trained in life and sometimes, you just have to start with the knowledge you do have.

16. Verse 30: The king said (to Runner #1), "Stand aside and wait here." So he stepped aside and stood there. ³¹ Then the Cushite (Runner #2) arrived and said, "My lord the king, hear the good news! The LORD has delivered you today from all who rose up against you." ³² The king asked the Cushite, "Is the young man Absalom safe?" The Cushite replied, "May the enemies of my lord the king and all who rise up to harm you be like that young man."

a) Here we read of David actually getting the news that Absalom is dead.

b) David told “Runner #1” to stand aside while he hears what “Runner #2” has to say.

c) Notice the tact of the Cushite (Runner #2). He said in Verse 32, "May the enemies of my lord the king and all who rise up to harm you be like that young man." To paraphrase, when David asked if Absalom was still alive, the Cushite said, “May your enemies now be like what Absalom is like now”.

d) David got it. There was no need to be blunt about it. That is obvious by the next verse.

17. Verse 33: The king was shaken. He went up to the room over the gateway and wept. As he went, he said: "O my son Absalom! My son, my son Absalom! If only I had died instead of you--O Absalom, my son, my son!"

a) The idea of “shaken” is that David was so crippled by the news of his son’s death he was physically and emotionally shaken all through his body.

b) Notice David’s cry, “If only I had died instead of you.”

i) Think about that: This is the son who ran David off the throne. This is the son who organized the rebellion. This is the son that wanted David killed.

ii) Personally, I would have cut the guy out of my will by now. ☺ It shows the love of David as a father overshadowed the events at hand.

c) This is a key verse. David “the father” understood the grief. He knew that his son Absalom was a reflection of his own personality. David thought, “If only I could have talked to him. If only I could have told him of my mistakes and my rebellion. Maybe then, he wouldn’t have turned out this way.”

d) One of the greatest moments of grief is to realize what you “could” have done. One reason the death of a loved one is hurtful because you stop and think in hindsight of all the things you could/would/should have said.

e) I have to stop and give my wife credit here. She’s a big believer in stopping to enjoy life and not be too caught up our routine requirements. She has taught me many lessons about enjoying life. God forbid that if something happens to her or my children, I could at the least, say that I stop every now and then to enjoy my time with them and not have any regrets that I “forgot to say something” if something happens to them.

18. Chapter 19, Verse 1: Joab was told, "The king is weeping and mourning for Absalom." ² And for the whole army the victory that day was turned into mourning, because on that day the troops heard it said, "The king is grieving for his son." ³ The men stole into the city that day as men steal in who are ashamed when they flee from battle. ⁴ The king covered his face and cried aloud, "O my son Absalom! O Absalom, my son, my son!"

a) The first three words are important here: “(General) Joab was told”.

b) The rest of the paragraph is the “what” Joab was told: It was told that David is sitting around crying about the death of his son. The morale of the army is at a low despite the fact that they won the war. The morale of the king has affected the morale of the troops.

c) This is a good lesson in leadership. How we act affects others around us.

19. Verse 5: Then Joab went into the house to the king and said, "Today you have humiliated all your men, who have just saved your life and the lives of your sons and daughters and the lives of your wives and concubines. ⁶ You love those who hate you and hate those who love you. You have made it clear today that the commanders and their men mean nothing to you. I see that you would be pleased if Absalom were alive today and all of us were dead. ⁷ Now go out and encourage your men. I swear by the LORD that if you don't go out, not a man will be left with you by nightfall. This will be worse for you than all the calamities that have come upon you from your youth till now."

a) Personally, I visualize Joab chewing David out in these verses. Joab and David have been lifelong friends. Joab is angry that David is sulking and he isn’t afraid to tell him.

b) Let me paraphrase Joab: “David, I’ve had it with your sobbing. There are thousands of men out there who risked their lives for you. Many have died for you. Yet, all you care about is the death of your son. Look, we’re not stupid. We can all relate to the fact you’re grieving over the life of your son. This is a time to put life in perspective. Yes, you’ve lost your son, but there is an army outside that was wiling to die for you. Now go out there, get a grip, and show some gratitude to those guys or you will lose them forever!”

c) This gets back to my theme of “emotions and decisions”. David was emotional over the death of his son. Who wouldn’t be here? Yet, the mistake was he let those emotions affect his role to be a commander in chief. Whether David liked it or not, God called him to be the king. That means he has to be a king. Yes, he can privately grieve over the death of his son. That pain hurts for a lifetime. You can’t let it rob you of your responsibilities.

d) The application is that God calls us to do things and God expects obedience. Yes, there are times in our life where it is painful and we need a break. God understands that and does not expect us to be workaholics. Yet, the balance can also go too far the other way, and we can let our emotions overwhelm us.

20. Verse 8: So the king got up and took his seat in the gateway. When the men were told, "The king is sitting in the gateway," they all came before him.

a)       &nb